Bourgie, Interrupted

Let me get this straight: we’re really going to let men decide that we can’t enjoy wedges anymore? I made it through the Kitten Heel Revolt of 2010 relatively unscathed and we’re still fighting the Cold War of the Ballet Flat but I cannot go quietly into the night this time. Wedges? Really? Let me back up a second and tell you why I think the debate is so utterly ridiculous.

It’s widely recognized that domestic violence is a serious human rights violation that affects women, children and families worldwide. Violence against women* impacts the stability of families, increases the burden on our bursting-at-the-seams healthcare system, and negatively impacts our economy. Violence against women can result in the loss of one’s home, job, and dignity or, in some cases, life. So you would assume that most people are all for ending violence against women, right? If by most people you’re including Republican leaders in Congress, you’d be wrong. With the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) up for reauthorization, there are forces within the GOP who would oppose this legislation simply because it contains provisions to protect LGBT and immigrant victims and recognizes tribal authority to prosecute domestic violence crimes against Native Americans.

March 10 is National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day, where government agencies, healthcare providers, community organizations, people living with HIV/AIDS, and more, come together to raise awareness about the continued impact of HIV/AIDS on the lives of women and girls in the U.S. and around the world. As a woman interested in public health and activism, I always feel compelled to speak on the issue and do my little part to raise awareness. However, it’s that very desire that trips me up and smacks me in the head with writer’s block. It’s 2012 … we aren’t aware yet? What else is there to say?

The death of pop star Whitney Houston resulted in more than 2.5 million tweets in just the first hour after her passing was announced, the proliferation of numerous fan tribute videos, and most regrettably, the resurgence of the term “crack whore.” I personally hate the term and never use it along with others like “crackhead” and “crackish.” My self-inflicted ban comes from the belief that being addicted to crack is not something to be taken lightly. Furthermore, “crack whore,” a term reserved for women offering their bodies for a taste of the drug, has the added bonus of misogyny and slut-shaming that our society employs so well. No, I cannot clap to that.

There’s a home video somewhere on VHS that shows a pre-pubescent Nakia proclaiming that she wants to be the first black female President of the United States … and a model. Very cute, if not some indication of future megalomania, but I would not wish for job of POTUS today after seeing what President Obama has had to endure in the latest of many battles over birth control. Here’s the rundown:

Sometimes it seems like the forces opposed to Planned Parenthood are really engaged in some super genius reverse psychology aimed at increasing individual donations to the organization. Of course it’s just wishful thinking on my part but that’s exactly what happened when anti-choice lawmakers inCongress tried to de-fund Planned Parenthood in early 2011; the organization received more than $2M in donations. Now, it’s the Susan G. Komen Foundation that is raising goo-gobs of money for Planned Parenthood while taking a hit to their own reputation, to boot.

Believe it or not, having an abortion can be safer than childbirth. I know that for even the most pro-choice of us all that statement can seem pretty incredible, but a recent study in the journal Obstetrics & Gynecology grounds the assertion in reality.

Forget what will.i.am and other neanderthals like him have to say about a woman who comes equipped with her own condoms– it’s 2012 and the smart, sassy, sexy women out there know that having our own protection on deck is one of the many ways we control of our health and lives. The conversation is no longer whether you should have condoms, but rather which kind and where do you keep them? I was pondering the latter question as moved into a new apartment and unpacked the old zippered pouch I had been using for years to store all kinds of sex-related goodies.

I rarely get wrapped up in the world of entertainment “news” and gossip but something about this rash of recent, high-profile celebrity divorces has me upset. In 2011, we saw racks on racks of celeb divorces – Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson; Ashton and Demi; J.Lo and Marc Anthony; Mel Gibson and Robyn Moore; Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver; Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries; and Katy Perry and Russell Brand. While those couples certainly have problems of their own, they’ve gone largely overlooked by black folks. However, black gossip blogs, urban radio and predominately black social media circles have not been shy about commenting on the divorces of Kobe and Vanessa Bryant and Deion and Pilar Sanders. What’s disturbing is how the women in these situations are vilified, hated, and critiqued.